Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Eagle Eye

Will I like this movie?

Sunday, June 1, 2008


It's been a while since I've written. I've been so tired with this babies on the way. Back aches, hungry all the time. I'll be a mother shortly this year. And to think, twins!! The doctor joked and said there were 3 inside "....OH! Nope just 2." ha ha.... Hey and you know, my doctor is pretty cute. ;)

It would be a blessing to have 3, but 2 is good. Even one. :)

We finally got our wedding pictures in order. Man, we had so many pictures on our computer it's crazy. I mean, we got alot of our wedding pictures out, but there were still some that we needed to work on. So we finally did it. Working from home gave me some time to do this.

Feeling kicks here and there. Aww these two are gonna be a handful. They're gonna be just like their father. 3 babies. So the names of these kids will be either, John, Gio Marco....yeah I know, that's what the daddy wants. Or I was thinking Franco, after my good friend Frank. Now with the girls, I was thinking, Lia, Olivia, Jennifer.... what?? Jennifer? Did I say this??

Well I'm still looking for names. The baby book really isn't helping. I mean there are a ton of baby names in there, but i still can't decide on one that'll fit, you know? Crazy...

I'd like to give her my initials, but I can't find any really cool names like mine. ;)

Thursday, March 6, 2008

Vacation Time

Well, it's time for a vacation and we like to do it right. We'll fly to Hong Kong and hang out there for a while, then fly over to see some friends in Thailand. Just hope the plane ride doesn't make us cranky and we start to beat each other.

Ciao til our return.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

Remembering Amsterdam

So I'm getting ready for my trip to Hong Kong and Thailand. Although I'm a week early, I get excited and start packing right away. I like to take my time making sure I have the right stuff coming with me. And on this trip, I gotta make sure I don't pack too much of the right stuff or else I'll be pulling a heavy suitcase.

Years ago, with an ex, I took so much stuff. The poor guy carried most of it up hills and all around town. He had the strength but years later I realized that he might have been cursing me out under his breath as he walked with all my things. I learned alot from my travels with him. And now I am a much better traveler. I appreciate it more.

I was just remembering our trip to Amsterdam back in 06. First we stopped off in Belgium to see family and friends, then we took off and headed on a train to Amsterdam. When we got to Holland, it was snowing. It put a smile on my face. I stood there and stared all around me. Wow, look at this place. What I was seeing was the train station. I hadn't yet gone out to see the real Amsterdam yet. But I was impressed as soon as I got off the train.

So while we got ourselves settled, we walked around, shopped, ate, saw a comedy show then headed to bed. That was one day of non stop activities. Then the next day we went out again. We walked down to the red light district and I heard some guy ask us if we wanted to see some %ucking. OH MY VIRGIN EARS! Well, my virgin Amsterdam ears. I got sick all of a sudden and said to the guy, "Ahh we'll come back later!" Of course we didn't. Why we didn't, well that's another story. A story that I will not tell.

But the trip, overall was good.

Friday, February 29, 2008

The Transaction

It was dark, cold and raining outside. The balloon outside my home had deflated. I stood there and looked at it. As I stood there, the lights on his fantastic car came right at me. A tall handsome man got out of his car and asked, “Are you ready?” I nodded yes and closed the door behind me.

We headed down the road where other cars drove carefully along side us, except for one guy who was speeding in the rain. “Show off.” He said. “He’ll run off the road for sure if he doesn’t stop.” I said. But we didn’t care. We had a mission to complete.

The rain was falling heavy on the road. The wipers racing back and fourth to keep our view clear. We enter a parking lot and park. The rain continues to pound on the car. We look at each other and then get out of the car. He races for the umbrella and covers me, the Queen, under it.

“Are you ready for this?” He asked once again. “ No. Why don’t you take me back home. I have to bake a cake now. Yes!! Let’s do this!” He pulls out a bag from the trunk and shuts the door. We walk away a few feet and stop. He turns around to make sure the car is locked.

We weren’t afraid of the rain or the puddles as everyone around us were. They were running all over to find a dry place. Punk looking skate boarders running with their skate boards in their hands. Young blond bimbos walking extremely fast in heels they can’t walk in. Two men holding a sweater over their mother to keep her from melting. But we were calm. We had our LL Bean gear on. California folks don’t understand this. You just knew we were from out of town.

We stop at the location Mas had set up. He set up a time and a place for the transaction to go down at. That’s right. Transaction. We didn’t want to look suspicious, but since we were cool looking, it was hard to get people to stop looking at us. We looked at our watches to make sure they were in sync. “Check?” “Check. Roger that.” Confirms LJ. It was 6:45pm. We were 15 minutes early. As he stood there protecting the bag, I looked around to see who would show up. Would this man be early or show up at 7pm. With the rain still coming down, we thought he might be late. This would be the one and only time we would be there for this……transaction. Mas didn’t care for him after 7:15.

“What if the rain has caused major delays? We should wait until 7:30.” LJ says. “This will go down between 7 and 7:15 and nothing more. It’s not my problem. “How could you say it’s not your problem? This is big money here.” Noise from the crowd next to us caused us to silence ourselves. “We need to stay focused and watch out for this person. We don’t know what he’ll look like.” Mas said. “ I bet he’s tall, thin with brown hair. Any man name Grant must look like this. You remember Grant Show?” Mas looks at LJ and says, “You know, you talk a lot. Why is this?” LJ gives him a soft punch to the gut. “I like to talk! Talking is good. You should try it sometime.” “Why are all these people here talking? What do they talk about? Why do they talk about crap?” LJ looks at him as if strange and says, “People talk about lots of things. It’s what we do.” Tomas looks at the crowd and looks back at LJ and says, “That is not necessary. Silence is better.” She shakes her head back and fourth. “ You know, Mas…you’re not human. Do you hang upside down when you pee?”

The wind blows. The air was getting colder. The time was approaching 7 and no sign of Grant. A man walks by and looks towards Mas. LJ eyeballs him to see if he is just walking by or looking for Mas. But he continues to walk by. “I didn’t like that guy.” LJ says. “Why?” LJ watches as he walks away further. “He looked too bulky, like he was hiding something under that jacket.” “Perhaps it was his big gut. Muaw ha ha ha haaa” Says Mas.

Time went by and it was 7:10pm. No one was walking by anymore. The crowd had left and only two girls and one guy stood there talking and smoking. The smoke was annoying LJ. But the wind quickly blew it away. She turned around and noticed the girl’s rear. There was a lot of rear in the girl’s pants. She could hear it screaming. Suffocating. She needed a bigger size.

It was 7:14. “One more minute and I’m going to walk away and eat a burrito by 7:18.” But out of the corner came a man. He was tall, but not taller than Mas. He was thin and had brown hair. LJ was correct.

“Tomas?” Asks Grant. He looked like the type of man that would be interested in the package. He had that look. The look that made us think he would be trouble for us. “I have the money.” Grant says. “I have the goods.” Says Mas. “And I’m cold.” LJ mumbles to herself sadly.

The security guard at the door watched and wondered what was going on. Did he notice Grant handing Mas money? Yes, he did.

“I have 75 here. It’s all there.” Says Grant. Mas hands him the bag and tells him he can check it out if he wanted to. But Grant trusted him. And Mas trusted that he had the 75 dollars in his hands.

“Thanks, good night.” Says Grant and he walks away into the night. “He wore a rain jacket. Did you notice? He’s not from California.” LJ says. “Yes, I noticed. It doesn’t rain that much in California, so California people don’t own any. Nor do they own umbrellas, like this magnificent umbrella you see here.” LJ looks up at Mas and says, “Oh yes. It’s big and magnificent.” They head over to Chipotle and order their burritos. Mas holds his burrito in his hand and slowly pulls it towards his mouth for that first great bite. But before he bites into it, he looks at his watch. “The transaction went down as planned and my burrito is in my hand.” It was 7:18 on the dot. “I think he’ll like the camera bag. I did. But I like my new one better.”

Making Changes

Love can be a great thing or just something most of us wish we can do without. But we all want love. Or just to be loved. I want to be loved. And that I am, by many people. But the one person that counts the most is the man I spend the rest of my life with.

A friend came to me and said she was having problems with her husband. She said that he was leaving her. She didn’t want this. She shook her head back and fourth and held back her tears. I stood there trying to be strong for her because I didn’t want her to cry. “Be strong.” I said. And she looked back into her home and saw him walking around. She sighs. “Yeah, I will be.”

Weeks went by and I saw them together. She said they were working things out. They were getting help from their church to deal with it and not argue with each other. And that seemed to be working out just fine. They went off on a trip together for the holiday. Since then, I didn’t bring it up again. I just smiled and said to them both to have a great time. I suspected that maybe he knew that I knew about them, but I didn’t show it.

I took care of their cat while they were gone. And I noticed on their frig a contract agreeing that they would work things out and that he would move out and find a place. Then they both signed it. I stood there and said to myself, “What a shame. They really are going to spilt up.”

They came back home and I didn’t see her for a few more weeks. I knew she was home, but she didn’t come out. I went out to sweep my patio and saw him walking to his house with boxes. I turned my head away and kept sweeping. “Hey!” I turned around to him. “Hi there.” He walks over to my patio and says, “You know, it never stays clean.” It didn’t register at that moment. Then I realized. “Oh yeah, I know. With the Santa Ana winds blowing, yeah. I just thought I’d clean it up since we’re having company today.” He said something else, but I can’t remember. All I did was smile and talk to him like nothing was wrong.

It’s hard going through these kinds of things. The last thing you want are the neighbors near by knowing your business. It could get embarrassing.

The door bell rings. Mas calls me and I come running down the stairs. “Hi there!” Says my friend. I figured I’d wait till she came to us. I didn’t want to go over there to check on her and walk into an ackward situation.

“I just wanted to let you both know that I’m moving out.” I was surprised because I thought he was going to move out. Most of the time it’s the man that leaves the house behind to the wife, but in this case she was leaving and moving into an apartment far enough away that she wouldn’t have to run into him.

I took her upstairs to talk. Figured I’d leave Mas out of some mushy women talk. We went up to my bedroom and sat on the bed and talked. I could smell beer seeping out of her pours. Reminded me of men who drink and come home smelling. Either way, I could smell it. She was a wreck and I knew that from that moment on, she was going to get even worse. Being alone after 20 years is hard. Leaving your comfortable surroundings is hard. Not sleeping next to the person you had by your side for 20 years is going to be hard to get over. And I thought...she’s going to be okay. But then she revealed some things that took me in a whole new direction. He was unfaithful to her for 4 years. All I could think after she told me this was that this was going to mess her up big time. She’s going to have nightmares. She’s going to be angry for a long time. How can a person, at 52, cope with such a blow to the heart, especially when her husband was leaving her to be with another man?

She needed to leave the house. He had brought his lover there several times and all she could think of was where they were. What they were doing. How they were doing it. She looked as if she was going to pull her hair out in front of me. She had been betrayed. And worse, he could have exposed her to the things we fear of the most. Diseases.

He’s ready to move on, while she is devastated and lost. It’s hard to start over again. It’s going to be a roller coaster of emotions for her. He’s become cold, while her emotions cause her to scream at him. The more and more she realizes things, it hits her hard. She found lover emails. Gay chat rooms. She sat there shocked. She wondered what was he thinking all these years. Why wasn’t he honest with her? He was just afraid to admit it. He didn’t want to hurt her. But does that mean a part of him loved her and didn’t want to lose her?

One day she will feel she’s okay. Then the next she’ll be angry and thoughts will fly through her head. She’ll scream. She’ll kick and throw things. She’ll cry in the tub with the shower running over her. She will struggle to get it out of her system. But at the end, she will be her again. She will smile. And she will get another chance to find someone to love and truly love her.

I wish her well.